Decisions, decisions...
Decisions are sometimes major turning points in our lives. Should I stay or should I go? Should I tell? Which way to turn? Buy or sell? Do or die? At other times they seem smaller, may even be smaller. Will I have an apple or a banana? Will I phone her today? Will I check my email? Will I try? A handful of these little choices have long shadows though. You didn't try, but you would have won. You didn't call, and a loved one passes away before you get the chance again. Such dense matter this decision-making, easier sometimes to stand still. True stillness is rarely a possibility however.
"There came a time when the risk to remain tight in the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom."
-Anais Nin
In my life at the moment, the big decision has been made. I was living a lucky life on paper, but was increasingly unhappy with the sacrifices made in exchange. The things I hold most dear were fighting for breathing room with a job that I love. So I am walking away from the job that I love, towards an authentic life with time for my loved ones and time for my soul. Such a big decision, decided in one small precious moment of clarity. "No!" to stress, new clothes, dinners out and mindless shopping. "Yes!" to health, marriage, art, reading, distant family.